(Yaaaawn, streeeetch) Good morning, everyone! I’m a slumbery coyote in January, and I’m just now rubbing the Christmas crud from my eyes. Please allow me to introduce myself. I’m Tony Perez aka Coyote, (everyone should have a playa name) and quite simply, I’ve been elected to be your DPW and ranch guide for the next several weeks. For those of you who are just checking in, we’re the crusty, dusty mechanics who troop out to the desert somewhere in July to bang in Black Rock City, and then make it go away by October — glorified carnies, if you will. Feeling a little misunderstood, (someone could use a hug over here!) we figured that the folks might like to know just what goes on in the desert during the forgotten winter. For instance, did you know that much of the playa becomes a lake in the winter? Somewhere in November, a snow storm hit, and imagine a flat Black Rock desert under a blanket of blinding white!! Mr. Metric (ranch manager, and keeper of the winter flame), had cleverly said one time that in the process of cleaning and restoring the playa, the watery winter was the rinse cycle. I like that. Well, he should know – he’s one of the few who actually stays out there year around. Yes, some people do!
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Over the several whacked out burning years, one might imagine the stock pile of materials that mounts from the hundreds of orphaned projects that trek to the desert. After Burning Man ’97, we realized that we we’re going to half to get some turf to stow the stuff – so Black Rock Station was born, and we now have a two hundred and eighty acre root growing about twelve miles north of the playa. It doesn’t have a moat or a draw bridge yet, but we do have some armored Knights that reside in that high desert winter sub-freeze. Sir Metric is our lone wolf resident that knows the where-abouts of pretty much every nut, bolt, and screw. Sir John Kelly aka Kamakaze, has become his faithful squire. And Sir Sam, the Jamaican Jah-man rests quietly in some un-known lair, showing up daily to spin his wrenches and fix all that the winter desert gods have broken. Who are these people?! Meanwhile, Sir Flynn, and Maiden Lisa have a home in Gerlach – (you know, the rootin’ tootin’ junction just south of our play ground) and are bringing the newest little girl burner up to speed. (Timberline is just over a year old, now). This team is in charge of operations, properties, real-estate, landlording, daily details, dealing with the wild westy locals, crossing t’s dotting i’s … what the hell ever!! And all of this in the winter-whipped bleak land of the northern Nevada high desert. Hats off to these invisible war heroes that our event truly depends on!!
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So the cogs and wheels of the hidden machine that cranks out our amazing momentary city wish to be recognized and understood. What better way than the weekly ‘Day In The Life’ of the Nevada properties, and the workings of DPW. So I’ve shouldered the task of this hopefully weekly column, ‘The Coyote Nose’
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Here’s a good one! Wishing to gather items for this column, I sent a message to Sir Metric asking him just how things where. Because of the goofy nature of our friendship, it went something like this:
So how’s the daily routine?
What did you eat today?
Heard that the storms are kicking ass
What blew over? What blew away?
What did you fix?
What did you break?
Do you eats beans?
Do you eat steak?
Who are you loving?
Who are you hating?
Tired of masturbating?
Give me something soon.
Coyote clear
Metric’s clever response:
So how’s the daily routine?
Getting the whole ranch clean.
What did you eat today?
An egg cheese and pork tortellin-ay
Heard the storms are kickin’ ass.
Sunny, warm, and growin’ grass.
What blew over? What blew away?
Office building askew, Rivka’s dome’s array
What did you fix?
Re-oriented crew dynamics
What did you break?
The onset of slake.
Do you eat beans?
Wanting more greens.
Do you eat steak?
Give me a break!
Who are you loving?
Cats good for snuggling.
Who are you hating?
Gerlach goons grating.
Tired of masturbating?
Seems to be abating.
Give me something soon.
There you go, you goon.
Coyote clear
Now send us some beer!
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So, even though it seems that the burning bear hibernates in its den for the winter, there’s actually lots of goings ons, gossips, and did-you-knows, and this Coyote won’t have troubles finding items to write about. I mean, the politics surrounding this event alone!… We are an alternative community after all, and even in our supposed free country, true freedoms must be fought for. ‘Coyote Nose’ can help to keep ya’ll posted. Got something on you’re mind? Got something that needs to be said? I’m hoping that this column can be a venue for this kind of thing. Just mail it in, baby!
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On a side note – me and the cronies like to kick up a fuss now and then, so we sometimes pull out the instruments and drum up the party gods! I have a funk-jam band in the city called ‘Tony Perez and Second Hand Smoke’ and this Tuesday, I’ll be playing at the Red Devil Lounge, splitting the bill with a latin-funk band called ‘Bautista’ Sounds pretty fun, huh!
Red Devil Lounge
Polk and Clay (S. F.)
Tuesday, Jan. 28th 9:00pm Come meet us! We’ll be there!
Coyote Nose
